People are fascinating. Sometimes in a frustrating way, but fascinating nevertheless. I am going to talk about one of the frustrating, yet amusing, things about people; power and perception.
I will say that I believe very few people are truly powerful. Titles are a dime a dozen. For my purposes, I will classify someone as "powerful" if they are respected by most people, hated by a few (some people are always going to hate people that have influence), and are thus capable of influencing a group of people. Scale is not necessarily important. This could be a world leader or just someone in a group of friends. I will mention that power can kind of be obtained through fear. However, I don't believe that is "true" power. As I see it, true power is influencing people because they want to do it, not because they have to. Ok, definition done.
I meet and deal with a lot of people. So many of them seem to feel the need to express their superiority over others. "Oh, I went to college", or "I have been doing this for 30 years", or "my dad did this awesome thing", or "I have this fancy title", or "I make so much money", etc, therefore, I am better than you. I hate this attitude. I really can't stand it. I have met people who have treated me like shit because they thought I was stupid because they thought I didn't go to college. They then found out that I did and their complete attitude about me changed. All the sudden, they started talking to me like I was intelligent and we were BFFs. I wish I was kidding, but i'm not. They completely judged me as a person and assumed they were better than me and I was not worth their time based off of some piece of paper that some people at an institution thought I deserved. Having been to college, I base little value on degrees. But that is another discussion for another day. Yes, college is important, no, going to it does not make you better than anyone. The people who I am willing to follow and who I choose to have in my life are the people who avoid this kind of bullshit.
I have absolutely no desire to listen to (or really be around) someone simply because their title is "higher ranking than mine". It is a completely arbitrary system that humans made to give themselves perceived power over others. I mean, in certain situations I don't really have much of a choice, but I am not going to be happy doing what someone says, or stay in a position for long where I have to, because they have a title. To be happy following someone, I have to respect them. I need to have a basic idea of their values, means, goal, and purpose to truly follow someone.
The part that blows me away is how many people don't seem to get that. Yes, you are my superior in this situation because someone else said you were, so it is in my best interest to do what you say, but I don't like your values and I think your end goal is stupid. If I do what you tell me, it is only because I really want to keep doing whatever it is you are in charge of, not because I actually believe in what you are doing or have any respect for you. Try not to get your ego too worked up about your power over me. I am doing this because I want to, not because you are better than me.
The too common attitude that so many people seem to have that makes them compare themselves to others based on superficial things is ridiculous. You can feel it and sense it when someone judges you based off of something dumb. It shouldn't be about you compared to those around you, its about you compared to what you can be. Really, we all have different talents. We then make our choices. We can choose to develop or skills and talents and be the best we can or we can choose to be lazy. I won't say that I don't judge people, I do. I know it's not my place to, but we all do it regardless of if we should or not. But when I judge someone, its only based on them. On their choices and who they are, not on some arbitrary, man made system designed to give us the false perception that we are better than someone else.
I believe people are truly powerful and deserving of respect when they have an attitude along the line of "I am awesome because I am me" and just leave it at that. It isn't about what makes you better than others. It's about what makes you good in and of itself. That is how I try to live, and I find that people respond really well to it. Most people I meet are eventually willing to listen to what I have to say. Not because I went to college, not because someone decided I was in charge of a project, not because of whatever perceived superficial thing, but because of who I am and my confidence in that.
So I guess what I am saying is, power comes from respect. Respect comes from being the best you can be, regardless of what is around you.
